The questions as set out below are to be used as guideline to check if you suffer from an addiction. They are not meant to be used as a method of diagnosis, nor does a negative answer to these questions give you the guarantee that addiction is not present in you.
We are aware of the fact that diagnoses of addiction is a very serious and personal matter. We hope these questions can help you with this. Try to look at yourself and how you feel inside honestly whilst taking these tests.
Yes
No
1. Is their more pain than happiness in your life?
2. When you talk with your girlfriends do you talk more about his problems and thoughts?
3. Do your sentences start with, he?
4.
Do you blame his gloomy moods, indifference or put downs on his problematic youth?
5. Do you try to change him? therapeutise him?
6.
Do you underline sentences in self help books that we think could help him?
7.
When his behaviour towards you is not sympathetic, do you just accept it, hoping that if you stay attractive and loving enough he will change for you?
8. Does the relationship put you in emotional or even physical danger?
9. Do you have a relationship with an alcoholic, gambler, sex or drug addict?
10.
Do you know the relationship is bad for you, but don’t make any efforts to end it?
11.
Do you give yourself reasons to stay in the relationship that do not outweigh the damaging aspects of the relationship?
12.
When you think about ending the relationship, you feel uneasy and frightened, which attaches you even more to this relationship?
13.
When you try to end the relationship, do you have physical feelings of withdrawal, that disappear as soon as you start the relationship again?
If most of these signals pertain to you, you are probably in a addictive relationship and you have lost the capacity to guide your own life. The first step towards recovery is to recognise the problem and to inventory the addict behaviour.By working on your own recovery with a counsellor of within self help groups you will be able to see if the relationship can be improved or if you should end it.
